"But, Can He Lip-Read?": Why This Simple Request Is Problematic...

 I want to share something that happened recently with my 4-year-old son during a hospital visit.

He’s deaf and uses Auslan as his first language. We’d done all the prep—his communication needs were clearly noted in his file. And yet… in walks a nurse who leans in and starts speaking to him. No signs. Just words. As if he could “just lip read.”

And my heart sank.

Here’s the thing—lip reading might look like a solution, but it’s not. It’s not a language. It’s not reliable. It’s not something we should be expecting kids—especially little ones still developing language—to rely on.

Lip reading is a survival strategy. One deaf people have developed because our world still hasn’t caught up with accessibility.

Think about it: facial hair, masks, mumbled speech, fast talkers, accents—any one of those can completely derail a conversation. Imagine trying to understand and respond to all that when you’re 4 years old.

We need to shift the narrative. Instead of asking deaf people to adapt to us, what if we asked how we can adapt to them?

Simple questions like: “How do you prefer to communicate?” go a long way. And being willing to learn and actually try is everything.

That moment in the hospital reminded me that we’re still climbing a very steep hill—but every conversation like this moves us forward.

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